I don't actually think I'm going to finish my last post, there is just too much to say..
So I haven't posted something in a while, and trust me, there is a lot to say.. But unfortunately, I don't know where to begin. I guess I'll start with saying that the love of my life, the only one who owned my heart, took my heart right out of my chest, and tossed it like it was nothing.. This was over a month ago, and the experiance made me hate Valentine's Day even more than I already do. We had planned to do something for Valentine's Day, but were not able to see each other then. We then planned to meet on the Saturday after, to watch a movie, and exchange gifts..
The Friday after Valentine's Day, (It was on Thursday), Jordan had texted me at 10:30 at night to tell me that he couldn't come over.
It ripped my heart right out, because I hadn't seen him in about a month, and I had planned to see him; I missed him like you would never know. I got mad at him, like I rightfully should have, but then it went downhill from there.
The next day I didn't hear from him at all, and I went to check my messages on myspace. Let me say now, the night Jordan texted me saying he couldn't come over, I had a dream he broke up with me.
I see that Jordan sent me a message, and I broke down and cried right there. I didn't open it, but I knew exactly what it was going to say. I opened it, and tears ran down my face like I have never had happened before.
... He didn't want to lead me on. Apparently, he couldn't learn to love me back. He couldn't see that I was a loveable person. He said that the distance made it hard. He said he didn't want to hurt me but he did. He still wanted to be friends. He wanted it to stay that way..
Then why did you tell me you loved me, why did you want to go out with me, why won't you give me true reasons? If you say that it hurt you too, then why did you break up with me? Why didn't you want to make it work? Why couldn't you really love me too?...
It seems that in life, the question that never gets answered, gets asked the most.
... Why...
I'm sorry Jordan, that I loved you, because it's such a crime...
1 comment:
i'm sorry about it.... Its hard when your loved person break down with you... So hard.
It seems easy to say, i know, but you have to think that if him don't wanna stay with you.... nothing have sense. Its stupid to worrie about one person who doesn't care about you and don't want know nothing of you..
Huges from Barcelona, and go to hell with that boy! You are a fantasitc girl, and you need someone who apreciate you at 100 percent.
PD: sorry for my english, i hope can understand the general idea :***
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